Making a Mark

Last week I had a 3 minute re-consideration of my choice of career. I came across pictures and postings of the work of a few of my friends and acquaintances who are/were serving people in Africa. In both cases these people used their career paths (economics, political science) to serve and better the people and conditions these people were living in. More than that they were offering their gifts, their years of hard work and study, to make a difference. I suddenly realized that I hungered for the same things they were doing with their lives. I looked into my life and thought for a moment and saw that I was living a selfish life. I strive and challenge myself with music everyday but this will never provide me with the resources or ideas of how to create wells in the poor villages of Africa or how to help re-construct the unfair cast system of some countries. I felt defeated; I wanted my efforts to make a difference in the world and I truly wanted to help and serve people. I mean, I couldn't look at the pictures of their faces and not care. So I was saddened for a bit and wondered if I truly wanted to commit my life to music, although I figured it was too late.

But then I realized something. Today I realized that my God-given gift CAN BE and HAS BEEN used as a gift to others. If I ever visited Africa to do mission or humanitarian work I can bring joy and happiness into others' lives through music. When I went to Romania I did this. When I go perform at nursing homes and assisted living centers I do this. Another thought came to me: while there (wherever I go) I can work on humanitarian needs as well. I can do both - bring pleasure but also bring necessities. Providing those necessities are not what I've dedicated my life to be and strive for but I have an able body and a servants heart. In addition, I've been told several times from musicians that if you feel called to be a musician or its your passion and you're willing to work hard, then you should go for it and try while you're young. If you want to go back to school for something else (business for example) then you can do so in your later life ... forties or fifties. That also was a thought of comfort.